Oh the Randomness....

There's actually someone saved on my phone as Bastard. No we're not fighting or anything but there's nothing that seems more appropriate for me to call him but that, lol. If i'm scrolling down and thinking of calling him, just seeing that, reminds me to back the F off, or if caller id shows him calling, i know not to get carried away by any of it...........lol. I think if he knew he'd actually be quiet upset he's in my phone as bastard, hehehe.


I saw Lola Omotayo in an industry mag, as part of an ad for the agency she works for. I couldn't believe that she's actually dating Peter of P-Square, one would think their world seems quite far apart. I wonder how they met and started to actually date, as opposed to just flirting. That's like me interacting with DBanj as part of work (i wish, lol!) and then just hitting it off. I wonder what her colleagues would have said and if they talked behind her back! I hear she's a hot cookie though, as in, she's quite good at her job, so kudos to her!


A contestant on the Gulder Ultimate Search show recently died during taping in a drowning accident. Nigerian Breweries which makes Gulder has recently given the family N20 million naira as part of compensation. However what I don't get is that the show is still going ahead with the reality show. I'm not sure this would have happened in America. It's interesting though as i'm wondering what the boy's mother must be thinking through all of this...she lost her only son and now here's this bags load full of money, i'm sure unfathomable money for her. Knowing Nigerians and suspicion, would she spend it? would she wish it all away for the presence of her son? Would she have moments of secretly relishing the money?


The record industry in Nigeria is growing indeed however is it sustainable? An artist whom you would have paid N5mil previously, they would have come in for negotiations, you guys would laugh and joke and get to know each other and build a relationship with the company, but now...........record companies come in as artist managements and charge N10mil and play hard to catch on the phone. Business is not always about the bottomline, especially in this business. I know we now have savvy people who spent the better parts of their lives in New York, Paris, London, watching P.Diddy and trying to learn everything from his moves, but not all those things are readily adapted here, the ages of the industries are too different. In the beginning back in those places, building relationships was key. We've lost that.......i hope it works out sha, but for i'm starting to see that rather than spend N10 mil on ONE artist, marketing dollars is better spent elsewhere.


WOMAN: officer please i own the car, my son was just driving it.
LAGOS POLICEMAN: ok, madam so what do you want me to do?
WOMAN: officer, please release him
LAGOS POLICEMAN: (irate) so now you're telling me what to do?!?!?

true story.


Ok, toodles! I know this is random ish, but i tried to warn y'all beforehand!!!

Indecent Dressing & An Ode to Abuja

No.......the two topics surprisingly are not related! Let me start with the first one. I'm sure many of you in blog world now know that Lagos is under siege fanatics and fascists. In fact maybe I should do a post later on the parallels of Nigerian culture today and fascism, but that'd be another time. The topic of the day is the supposed "law" that was given to police officers to enforce which is that they are to arrest people for indecent dressing and thugs. Now they say they are trying to get rid of prostitutes and armed robbers, but we all know better. Which kind of law is enforced without parameters and without communication to the citizenry that it affects? What this means is that any police officer is allowed to subjectively decide what dressing is decent and indecent. From my experiences (which i will highlight) and those of others (Funmi Iyanda) it is really my conclusion that these guys harass women based simply on whether they get a hard on or not. The hard-on test.

I can't even begin to state how angry and upset this whole thing makes me because really the depth of it is beyond words. But really, I have to confess that i'm not surprised. We live in a society where everyday women are undervalued and maltreated and we say nothing so how can we be surprised that something like this should happen? A society where a widow gets kicked out of house and home after her husband dies with nothing, or is "inherited" by her in-laws, a society where women are always subservient to the men around them, a society where women are told they are nothing without marriage, without children, a society where there's really no such thing as spousal abuse, a society where women do not have a voice. These are everyday things and we say nothing so now it has come to this. Women are harassed for wearing pants in Lagos. For wearing a tank top in Lagos. for showing their collarbone in Lagos. For just being. I'm waiting to see if we all will still do nothing. Martin Luther King Jr. said something, he said "Injustice against one man is injustice against all mankind" (or something like that). Basically it means whenever we sit, men and women, and say well it's not me so I'm not going to do anything, one day it will come and meet us at our doorsteps.

Last week I was harassed TWICE on the same day by police men on the streets of Lagos. I was wearing a pantsuit with two layers under the jacket. The first incident was right in front of my office. I was waiting for a taxi and two KAI officers (Kick Against Indiscipline) started shouting at me that they were going to arrest me. Me thinking it CANNOT be me they're talking to, turned to look back. The guy now yells YES YOU, I'M GOING TO ARREST YOU, ALL OF YOU PEOPLE. So I just gave him a look and looked away, but still I was fuming. The second incident was myself coming from the island to the mainland at 9:30pm. The police officer at the road block stops the car and tells the driver to park.

HE: where are you coming from
ME: my friend's house
HE: at this time of the night?
ME: yes, is there a problem there?
HE: don't you know it's too late for you to be out?
ME: really? is there a law against that? is there a curfew in Lagos?
HE: get out of the car
ME: i'm not getting out of anything
HE: where do you work?
ME: (name) plc
HE: where's your id card?
ME: (showed it to him thankfully i had it with me)
HE: why are you out at this time walking around like you own yourself
ME: (laughing increduosly) please abeg who owns me?
HE: you should not be out at this time, don't you know you're a woman, if you were a man yes, but a woman, it's not right.
ME: (sensing that this man's problems are too numerous to start on right now) thank you very much enh? can i go now?

He finally let me go but I couldn't believe that I lived in this country right at that minute. I'm more convinced than ever that it is people's minds and perceptions that we need to change and it's a big battle that we can no longer put off. Everyone should be playing their part lest the problem gets bigger. Us young men and women, we should be at the forefront of this battle.

Now to Abuja
One of my earliest posts, I wrote about how I love abuja, and truly I do. I was in abuja over the weekend for the wedding of a friend and I fell in love with the city all over again. Any one that has a job in Abuja open, abeg hook a sister up! That city is beautiful and quiet and peaceful.

Back to Abuja Airport :o(

Myself and Timi (Winner of West African Idols)

Interestingly one can say Abuja is more conservative than Lagos is but people are not getting harassed in Abuja. When they were rounding up prostitutes in Abuja they went to the spots they usually are and actually rounded them up from there not harassing innocent women who are going about their own business. Funnily, at Abuja airport a woman comes up to me and says that she really appreciates the way I dressed and she thanks me for not exposing myself. My people, i was wearing a short (above the knee) string halter neck dress but with a small cute bolero type thingy. In Lagos I would have been arrested for indecent dressing i'm sure - just to confirm that the lagos fascists are crackers!

Big Brother How I Love Thee

big brother
big brother
how i love thee
no more waiting for grey's
jacob's cross can have its slot
no more flipping from channel o
to mtv base for 2005 punk'd
big brother
big brother
how i do love thee

Ok, ok, I never caught the Big Brother Nigeria (BBN) thing cuz quite frankly it was wack. West African Idols didn't take my fancy either as it equally was wack, topped up by the beefy, sweaty, no camera presence personality of Mike Magic (or whatever). Don't even get me started on Deal or No Deal Nigeria as watching John Fasanu actually makes my ear bleed and induces suicidal tendencies. But yesterday, yesterday, I broke down and finally watched Big Brother Africa (BBA) more because I had actually applied for the sucker and didn't get picked so was wondering who in the world would make better tv (that babe is too boring jo!). Yes, you can actually read that again, I applied, ehn ehn so what? lol. There's a part of me that gets irresistably drawn to these crazy stunts, I mean how many people in the world can say they were a BB housemate?

Anyway, I'm loving the thing sha. The people (see Bella's post) are just plain ridiculous. There's something fascinating about watching all kinds of personalities interact, especially from different countries too! I think my fav's are Kwaku from Ghana and Max (from wherever!) since they're the sexiest, lol. It was funny to me how from the get, the Tatiana girl from Angola just fashied her so-called boyfriend. Kai! And i'm sure she's trying to make the short man her bitch, mark my words! One thing that shocked me though since i never watched any of the BBs was the shower scene!!!!! as in, seriously oh, they were showing tatas everywhere, i couldn't believe that they do this. I don't think the one in America does that oh! I was shocked, just absolutely shocked ke?!? as in cameras in the shower showing everything oh, no be like say dem get blind screens oh? hmmm...when everyone was shouting shower hour, shower hour, that's how i was thinking that wetin dey there sef? until i saw with my korokoro eyes....

Anyhoo....keep shining sha...in other news...

Do You Think We Have Slaves?
Something's been bothering me lately and I wondered what other's take on it would be. Let me give you a scenario:

1. Someone strolls into the office in the morning carrying his newspaper under his arm, his minion walks behind him, carrying the man's laptop bag.

2. One small boy comes to meet his oga in the office but sits around for hours outside before the oga comes in and then when he calls the small boy from across the compound, he sends him to go wash his cup, or walk to the next building to fetch a paper or something.

Now my thing is, for number 1, why can't you carry your own damn laptop bag from your car to your desk? all of 5min walk?

are these people slaves? seriously...