Leave my Nigeria Alone!

Ok, so I know i've complained on this very blog about some of the nuances of living in this country - and there are many - but I do that because hey, at the end of it all, I still live here, day in, day out, so I should know what i'm talking about. It irks me when someone who doesn't live here, and hasn't for a long time, starts bashing my Lagos. Jeez. (Yes, people, get over that shock, I did say MY LAGOS). Things are just done differently in Lagos. It's kinda like New York, you can't just come to NYC and complain about why everyone's walking fast, why you see cross dressers walking freely and openly in the streets, or why the subway is dingy and dirty. It just IS. You like it or move to Benue. Simple. And yes, some of this sound downright hypocritical but what can I say.......it's one of those things where I can say nigger cuz i'm black so it's all good but when a white person says it, he should follow those words by bending over and kissing his ass goodbye.

Which leads me to my moment of revelation this morning. I was walking past the vulcanizer (or fuckanizer, means the same in Lagos), and I noticed that while the people congregated there really resembled area boys (or street thugs for my non-nigerian readers) my heart didn't even skip a beat, i just strolled past. I had noticed that yesterday too while I was waiting in the car for my colleague on Lagos Island, but not the cool, posh parts, i'm talking right in front of Sura Market. The place was packed and crowded with all sorts of elements, people where walking up to my window and pissing right in front of (i'm still not sure why), some random area boy just got up, cut a branch of tree and started whipping bus conductors unless they paid him money......remember I said randomly! Anyway amidst of this chaos, I was just chilling. So I thought to myself, where did i develop this sort of non-fear of area-boys???? Especially considering the fact that once upon a time I was scared of groups of African-Americans in freaking Buffalo (yes, it's true, Canada will do that to you)? The only difference between then, and now is..............................B-ROCK!!! Maaaaaaaaaaan...............once u do B-Rock High, you develop this thick skin........who knows, maybe docking bullets from a drive-by will do that to you......ah, the good ol' days!


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Queen of Procrasti Nation! said...

Girl, you know Lagos is a crazy place! I would move to Benue... if I considered farming or teaching at a local secondary school without doors, windows, desks or books lucrative career options :-)

Anonymous said...

hey chic...am loving ur blogs and u still hella krazy....first of all when did lagos become your lagos??? abeg calm down u aje butter..

i loved the "fuckanizer" part...lol!!! omo where can i go to school to be a fuckanizer.....hehe..

nice that u are having fun in MY nigeria


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wienna said...

I go send some after u soon. U no rest....LOL